A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, I lived on Planet New York. I was a smidge younger, my skin was taught, and I was full of piss and vinegar. (I’m referring to my attitude, not a kinky night out at at The Vault.) I would rollerblade between jobs and sometimes at my job, making the ABSOLUTE MOST of my 20’s. Genetics helped, but I also bought into gym culture. Who knows how many gym memberships I had? The following is a letter I wrote following a homophobic incident at one of the more popular gyms.

May 17, 2001

Re: New York Sports Club

14^th & 5^th

Is New York Sports Club Homophobic?

My Termination of membership

Today I went to the gym at 3:00 pm, ran on the treadmill for 20 min, rowed for 20 min, then made it through the bicep machine. Upon finishing this I set up the decline bench press and sat down on it to read my paper and rest for a minute before starting. I was approached by (name redacted) of NYSC and asked if I would join her in her office. I replied whatever it was she could ask me there. I felt as if I was being called to the principals office. She asked if she could give me a pair of shorts to wear. I told no, that I already had some on. She then asked me what kind of shorts they were and I replied “hot pants” and I’d been wearing them to the gym for the last year. She said “oh” and then I told her that there were several women walking around with thongs up their butts and no one seemed to have a problem with that. Then I started to get a little angry and told her that I wanted to cancel my membership if they wanted me to conform to their fashion choices. On the way to the office I said that a friend of mine had mentioned that she was changing to Crunch at the end of the month, because NYSC was just too Republican for her. I disagreed with her and said that NYSC was fine. I was wrong.

We were joined in the office by (name redacted), another employee of NYSC, who agreed that I was “inappropriately dressed”; I informed these two women that this was New York City, a diverse community. (name redacted) replied that this wasn’t New York City, this was “New York Sports Club”. I went on to say that I didn’t want to join their “clone zone” and could I see a copy of the dress code. (name redacted) said that this wasn’t available, and that it came with my membership packet. That was ridiculous. I would also like to mention that both of these women were dressed appallingly and offended my own personal taste.

I hold (name redacted) completely responsible for my terminating my membership after nearly 3 years there. I was in the gym for over an hour before I was approached. If I was so offensive why haven’t I been approached in the past, or earlier in my workout? I found the experience to be completely homophobic in nature and am saddened if this attitude is endorsed by NYSC.

Sincerely,

Todd Phillips

NYC, NY

CC:

New York City Dept of Human Rights

GLAAD

LAMBDA

HX

New York Blade

Next Magazine

Village Voice

Daily News

New York Times

Not one of the publications I sent it to, or NYSC ever responded to me. I had forgotten about it, until someone asked me about it the other day. Then, I randomly stumbled over the letter in my files. I guess I was supposed to be reminded of it again? I’m not upset by it. It was one of those things that happened and reminded me not to get too comfortable. I remember thinking how ridiculous and hypocritical I thought it all was. Also, this happened in New York City!?! I knew New York was far from perfect, but homosexuals were supposed to be safe there by the time I came along.

Since I wrote the letter, (almost 20 years ago) homosexuals can marry, divorce (thank goodness) and other laws have been put in place to protect and include us a bit more. So, at least that’s something. Now, I would look several, EXTRA times in the mirror to be sure I wanted to wear those hot pants out, but I believe people should wear what makes them feel good, fun, sexy or whatever, regardless of age or body type. The world is tough. Find joy wherever you can. I have nothing but respect for those who have found a way to brighten their lives by artfully draping or severely squeezing into some fabric and banging on a bangle. In the words of Iris Apfel, “Its better to be happy than to be well dressed.”